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Holy crap it's been so long!!
I sort of forgot my password and I just got it back 5 minutes ago lol :p
And I'm sorry to say this, but I haven't really drawn anything for a while... and the reason is: Confusional migraines... maybe... the neuro isn't sure if they're migraines yet, they could also be friggin' partial seizures, but the only thing he is sure of is that my EEG is abnormal and that I'm not making this up... like my shrink used to think  >:[

That's what my stupid brain has been up to for the past couple of YEARS! But I didn't know what it was until last week.
It is terrifying... I'll spare you the details, but they tend to distrort your sence of reality, that may be why my drawings have  taken a turn for the worst... they barely make sence anymore and I have been struggling to get back on track.

In fact I am not sure if I would be posting anything for a while... it's really not worth seeing, and I am too embarassed to post anything. I know I owe art to a lot of people (I haven't forgotten) but I just can't bring myself to do it yet.
I'll keep practicing but only time will tell if I ever make something worth showing again.
In fact, I have been thinking of closing this account for good and starting a new one, things have gotten a bit out of controll... I had 3,000 + messages on my inbox and there is no way I can keep track of that. 

I am sorry, I know this souns like layzness or excuses, but circumstances have changed, and I need to change with them if I want to keep doing this. (Which I do! I miss a lot of people here! You know who you are)
  • Listening to: Earthshine - Widek
  • Watching: One Piece (still stuck on the Dressrosa arc!)
  • Playing: Mario & Luigi: Paper Jam
  • Eating: Toast
  • Drinking: H2O
I'm taking a break from everything today, or else I'm gonna go insane.
And I wanted to use this opportunity to announce that this page is probably going to get a major reeboot in the near future. I mean, come on! it was long overdue! I've had it for 10 years and it hasn't changed too much, there are things in it that I am embarassed of!

So it begins with a major cleanup of both my gallery and my favourites, I won't delete gifts I've made for friends or art trades but I will put everything I did before 2012 in a separate folder called "old stuff".

There will also be some major changes in some of my characters, people change over time so it is also natural for the beings we use to represent ourselves in art or on the internet to change as well. 

You know I like lists so I'm gonna make a few just to give you a heads-up (and to hellp me keep track of what I have to do because my brain isn't wired to remember things on its own...)

Changes in page layout/ favourites, etc.

:bulletgreen: Change username, avatar and signature
:bulletblue: Make journals less ranty/ pessimistic (if I need to vent I'll do it elsewhere)
:bulletpurple: Close requests, art trades for friends only

Changes in art:

:bulletred: GET OFF YOUR LAZY BUTT AND FINISH EVERY SINGLE PIECE OF ART YOU OWE!
:bulletorange: Experiment with using different media such as watercolor, pencil and pastel.
:bulletyellow: Improve lineart skills, don't rely on color too much
:bulletgreen: Stop using a ballpoint pen for shading! 
:bulletblue: Experiment with different art styles, don't just stick with the same old one.

Changes to characters/ personas/ avatars:

:bulletgreen: White Eye will be getting a major reeboot

Why? First: because there was something I didn't consider when I first came up with her: cultural appropiation. Some things about her were somewhat disrespectful to Native American cultures, and that is the last thing I want such an important character to be. She will still be partially influenced by the Yoemen (Yaqui) stories my dad used to tell me when I was little, but overall, she will cease to be something that steals from other cultures. I am sure not all of you will agree with this but this is a desicion I didn't come up with on a whim, I did my homework and talked to people, and made my desicion based on what I learned.

Second: People change over time and so have I, and I don't feel as strongly connected to the character as I once used to so she will be changing with me. I also realized that, as a fantasy character, I can do whatever I want with her design so I am going for something a bit more daring than a white eyed grulla ;) I'm still playing around with her desing and story but you can see a sneak preview here 


:bulletyellow: I'm retiring some of my characters.
I really don't think I can work with some of them anymore, they are just trapped in limbo, just "existing" but never changing or interacting with anything, so I thought it was better to let them go. I still don't want to get rid of them because who knows? I may still be able to do somethin with them, so I put them into a "retired character" folder for now.

:bulletgreen: Grey the Hound will be modified, too.
No major plot or design changes for this one but the color of her her mohawk and her clothes will change depending on the situation or her mood, which I think will also hellp reflect her unpredictable and crazy nature.

:bulletblue: Changing Antare's wings.
:bulletpurple: Changing my "main" Pokemon RP character.
I no longer feel a strong connection to Fang the Treecko, but I did develop a very VERY strong connection to another Pokemon and I find it easier to RP with that one, so I decided to design a character based on that connection instead of trying to stick with one that I no longer identify with. I may upload a reference for that other character later on.

So, in conclussion:
I haven't really been neglecting art as much as I should (especially with all this thesist business around) because I simply can't :P 
And it is only a matter of time before I come back here with a vengance. 
  • Listening to: Gymnopedie No. 1- Erik Satie
  • Reading: Why Animals Matter - Marian Stamp Dawkins
  • Watching: One Piece (Dressrosa arc)
  • Playing: Majora's Mask 3D
  • Eating: A hamburger on a bread roll
  • Drinking: Scottish tap water a.k.a whiskey! (jk)
That rabbits can't stick their tongues out in the middle of their mouths?
They stick it out sideways, like this:



Its because their teeth get in the way xD
They can only stick it out in the middle when they are young, before their teeth grow too much.



... Yeah.
I'm trying to write a thesis right now, I don't even have time to think.
Imma do a Master's I said... Its gonna be awesome, I said... :no:
Thank you so much for your patience guys, it shouldn't be long before I wake this thing up from hibernation.
  • Listening to: The Mob Rules - Black Sabbath
  • Reading: Why Animals Matter - Marian Stamp Dawkins
  • Watching: One Piece (Dressrosa arc)
  • Playing: Nothing... NO FREAKIN' TIME!
  • Eating: sandvich
  • Drinking: Scottish tap water
FIRST OF ALL I WANT TO THANK EACH AND EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU FOR ALL OF THE BIRTHDAY/CHRISTMAS/NEW YEAR COMMENTS!
THANK
YOU
SO
MUCH!



HearseGurl 13black-light-dragon , snuffy-art , PeziCreation (really loved the cute dragon with the sign, too!) TheRejectPhoenix , OrionTHedgehog  and everyone else who commented and didn't get a reply THANK YOU.
I really mean it! 

I haven't replied because I got more than 2000 messages in my inbox and that number just makes me want to go away and never come back, it's not that I don't want to (well... it is a bit because I don't want to...) but because I don't have much time in my hands right now...

Contrary to popular belief this page is not dead.
It's just hibernating but once this year is over it will (hopefully) be back to it's former self!

... hopefully

So there are several reasons for this, one of them is that mentally and physically I'm not doing well, it's the worst I've been in years but it's nothing I can't handle, I'm tougher than I seem, I'll survive.
Another reason is work... lab reports, welfare assessments and assignments EVERYWHERE! so the only chance I have to draw anything is during lectures and it never goes beyond a tiny pen sketch.

Other than that everything is going great! my gades haven't dropped as much as I thought they would and life in Scotland is everything I hoped it would be :) I'm literarily living my dream.

But what they never tell you about dreams is that they require a LOT of effort, sometimes it hurts, sometimes it kicks your butt untill you feel like you can't do this anymore but that's the way it is, you should never expect it to be easy, if you want a happy ending you need to fight for it with all you've got and that's what I'm trying to do here. 
I hate sounding like a cheap motivational speaker but if I can do it then so can you, I'm nothing special really.

So, yeah, that's why I haven't been around much. I'm usually more active on Tumblr because it takes less time to interact with things than in most websites. You can find my main blog HERE and the blog where I eat weird things for the entretainment of complete strangers on the internet HERE so if any of you have a Tumblr we can keep in touch through there. 

Also:

:bulletred: I DID IT! I GOT INKED! it's still healing so it will still be a while before I show it to you ;) but it shouldn't be long now.

:bulletorange: I got catcalled the other day and didn't notice untill a friend told me :I 
Goes to show how socially inept I am lol.

:bulletyellow: Over the Garden Wall, man!! OVER THE GARDEN WALL!!! :iconranaplz:

:bulletgreen: MAJORA'S MASK 3D!!!!!!! MAJORA'S MASK 3D!! MAJORASMASK3D!!!JXKNFDGIAJNUGFIBHNSIFJ!!!!! 
:iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz::iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: :iconranaplz: 

:bulletblue: Here's my Pokemon Omega Ruby secret base QR code (haven't updated it in a while lol)
Send yours! ;)

:bulletpurple: Thanx for reading this, see you later!
  • Listening to: Golden and green - The builders and the butchers
  • Reading: The Clan of the Cave Bear - Jean M. Auel
  • Watching: Over the Garden Wall
  • Playing: Pokemon Omega Ruby, Harvest Moon a New Beginning
  • Eating: fish
  • Drinking: Scottish tap water
Greetings from Scotland! :D
Guess who flushed the soap down the toilet? a sleep deprived version of me, that's who!

So here I am, starting a new life and working my brain to a pulp with assignments and statistics.
Busy with farm visits and homework and just tying to figure out how this living on your own thing works.
That means... still no art, I am so sorry.

I hate coming back empty handed, and I still feel a stab of guilt when I think of those who I owe art to, but... I am working towards something I've wanted all my life, everyone keeps talking about "living your dreams" and I am lucky enough to have been given a chance to do just that, so I'm fighting to make it happen and it hasn't been easy. And that's the way it's supposed to be, nothing is free and if I want to change things for the best then I have to make choices, even if it means being alone for some time you know how it goes... I am a loner by nature and most of my social contact comes from online friends so neglecting those who care does bother me.

Anyway... now that the dramatic bit is over (just had to take that out) let me tell you... SCOTLAND IS AMAZING!!!
Now I may never want to leave! :D I do miss a few things like avocados (they're expensive and not very good...) and ... not walking 2 km uphill everyday, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I DON'T MISS? HIGH CRIME RATES!

I still can't believe I can walk the streets alone after sunset and making it back with my wallet! 
And being able to leave your laptop on top of your desk without the risk of it being stolen! I AM SO LUCKY TO BE ABLE TO LIVE HERE FOR A YEAR! 

... Oh by the way, I have NEVER, in all my life, felt short... untill I came here! Scotland is full of giants!
I am the exact same size of a Deoxys (1.70m 5 foot 7 inches acording to an online converter) and it can't really be called "small" c but... I have to look up to talk to some of my classmates and it feels weird!
I'm not complaining or anything, in fact it's pretty funny because ... my sister is even smaller HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! 


And how come you can drink tap water without getting sick?! what sort of sorcery is this?!
  • Listening to: Judgement Day - Blues Saraceno
  • Reading: Wicked - Gregory Macguire
  • Watching: One Piece (Punk Hazard arc)
  • Playing: Kirby Triple Deluxe, Pokemon X
  • Eating: Rice with mushrooms
  • Drinking: TAP WATER AWW YEAH!
Starting a jouran with an apology is getting really old but... I just feel like I owe you more!
Especialy for those who I owe art to, like my good friends nightchildmoonchild and snuffy-art I am so so SO sorry!

But I haven't had time for myself recently... I already mentioned that I'm going to study a Master's degree overseas... and finally, after hunting down people, a TON of paperwork and bureaucracy, and beating social anxiety like a boss I finally made it.
I am going to Scotland for a year and a half!
I wanted to share this victory with you because, you know me I am a loner and a sentimental and things like comments written on an art site remind me that I am not alone, so that's why I owe you so much better.

Art-wise, I am sorry but I don't know when I'll be able to work on it, I'll let you know once I've settled, and I'll do my best to get back on track once things are less chaotic.

Oh... another thing, I'm getting inked soon :mwahaha:
Don't tell mom.

This is not goodbye.
We'll meet again some day.
Thank you for everything and see you soon! :)

P.S: I have been eating paper for more than a month now and nobody noticed hehehehe :giggle:

P.S2: I saw Wicked, the musical, even though I'm not much into musical theater anything that begins with the words "Good News! She's Dead!" is definetley worth a look and it was so worth it!

P.S3: I COMPLETED THE NATIONAL POKEDEX IN POKEMON X!
that's right I managed to get 718 Pokemon including event legendaries like Shaymin, Arceus and Mew. I am only missing Diancie, Volcanion and Hoopa to literarily have them all!
  • Listening to: Jumpin' Jack Flash - The Rolling Stones
  • Reading: Wicked - Gregory Macguire
  • Watching: One Piece (Punk Hazard arc)
  • Playing: Kirby Triple Deluxe
  • Eating: Paper
  • Drinking: Blonde roast coffe (good stuff!)
And listen to this:



Seriously
Just listen to this.
The world must know.
  • Listening to: The song in the video
  • Reading: Minds
  • Watching: One Piece (Punk Hazard arc)
  • Playing: Minecraft, Pokemon X
  • Eating: Paper
  • Drinking: H2O
Ladies, Gentlemen and anyone in between....
I HAVE A VERY VALID REASON FOR MY LACK OF ACTIVITY!


Sleeping issues got worse, I've allways had trouble sleeping but it never got that bad! I thought daily morning headaches were normal (I blamed it on my caffeine adiction) but about five months ago it all went downhill. On nights where I somehow managed to sleep for more than four hours I'd wake up more tired than ever, so about a month ago I went to see a neurologist, a specialist in sleep disordorders, and after a 3 (annoying and uncomfortable)  nights of a polysomnogram study he found out what was wrong: freakin' sleep apnea!

I am not overweight, I don't have asthma or allergies and I DO NOT SNORE.
The cause is most likely genetic, my dad has it and so do an aunt and uncle from my mom's side.
According to the polysomnogram I stopped breathing 20 times in one hour, longest episode lasted 90 seconds. So... it's not something that can be solved by changing my sleeping position... I HAVE TO WEAR A FREAKIN' CPAP MASK THING! :frustrated:
I hate it, HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE IT! 
But if I ever want to rest again I have to get used to the darned thing.... and that's what I've been up to.
I've been tired and annoyed and don't feel like doing anything, my diaphragm hurts (it's normal at first), so does my nose, and my eyes are dry because the freakin' mask is the wrong size and I have to wait for the right one to arrive, and I have a small cough that won't go away and the head straps get itchy.

Sorry for complaining so much but... AAARGH!!!!! 
Getting used to it is really hard! and I hate the idea of depending on it for the rest of my life!
But.... apnea is even scarier, so.... guess I'll just have to get through this :no: I hope none of you have to go through this, you have no idea how important sleep is untill something like this happens.
  • Listening to: Sails of Charon- Scorpions
  • Reading: Dog Stories- James Herriot
  • Watching: One Piece (Punk Hazard arc)
  • Playing: Minecraft, Pokemon X
  • Eating: Tacos!
  • Drinking: Same as allways... water
I made it, I'm in!
They accepted my application and I'll be out of here by september! :excited:
I am so freakin' HAPPY! and so freakin' concious of how old I am... and how long I have been here! I wasn't even trough with jr. high when I made this account and now look at me! I'M OLD!
Thank you all so much for the support, I know I allways say that but I really mean it, I am a loner and don't hang out with people too much in real so being able to talk to someone is allways great, especially those who have stood by me for a long time.

Being in makes me incredibly happy but allso incredibly busy! bureaucracy, man! it sucks!
So... I know I've been absent and it doesn's seem like I'm going to become more active anytime soon.... that tmay be selfish but in the end it will all be for a greater good (hopefully...).

I've allso been busy mining and crafting... yeah... I got adicted to a pc game with a first person perspective and no plot, it's not like it's going to replace my usuall stuff but a little variety can't hurt, right? 
Man, I wished I had more time for games! it's been a whole week of pure bureaucracy and it doesn't seem to be comming to an end anytime soon! 

ONE OTHER THING!
please please PLEASE let me know if in any of my comments, journals or descriptions you see any gramatical or spelling mistakes! (my spellcheck is in spanish so allmost everything I write is redlined!) 
Now, I'm not asking you to act like an english teacher or anything but... if you notice and feel like letting me know don't be afraid! there are days where the part that controlls english in my brain decides it doesn't want to work and my english just... breaks!
I'm a bit too mentally overstimulated to notice so I don't mind if you go all grammar natzi on me now and then :)
  • Listening to: When the smoke is going down - Scorpions
  • Reading: A Wizard of Earthsea- Ursula K. Leguin
  • Watching: One Piece (Punk Hazard arc)
  • Playing: Minecraft, Professor Layton and the Azran Legacy
  • Eating: Paxil
  • Drinking: Same as allways... water
"My heart has joined the thousand, for my friend stopped running today"

From Watership Down by Richard Adams

Nana is gone.
This is what I was talking about last journal, that unsolved issue... well, it did got solved but not in the way I wanted it to.

My dwarf rabbit got very sick all of a sudden, she stopped eating and began losing weight really fast.
So we did what we could, I gave her some medicine and added some fruit juice to her water, fed her a special diet, changed her bedding as often as I could and overall tried not to bother her too much (she was very agressive and hated physical contact) And for a moment it seemed to be working, she was eating again and was moving around more, but one morning, just like that she was gone.
I wanted to give her a week to respond to the treatment but the reaper didn't give me a chance, she was gone before I could do anything.
Part of me thinks it was wrong to have made her endure it for so long, perhaps it would have been better to just put her to sleep.

I think it was cancer, some form of lymphoma, it's more or less common in dwarf rabbits.
She was six years old, rabbits usually live past their eight birthday.

Rest in peace, little beast.

Nana and Luigi by who-stole-MY-name
  • Reading: A Wizard of Earthsea- Ursula K. Leguin
  • Watching: One Piece (Punk Hazard arc)
  • Playing: Pokemon Heartgold, Harvest Moon (GCN and GBA)
  • Eating: Paxil
  • Drinking: Same as allways... water
:icontardarsauceplz:
I've been in a really bad mood because of things.
I don't like drama so I won't write an essay about it, but yeah... right now I need to forget about everything for a while.

And... I just noticed I have 666 messages on my inbox.
Never a good sign xD I've been stopping by now and then to try an keep the numbers below 500 but at some point I just stopped replying and commenting and now I don't know what to do! 

I am a bit more active on Tumblr if anyone still feels like keeping in touch, I'm such a grumpy old thing I dobut it, tough.
I know I'm a bad e-friend, too and I am really sorry.. but there is something kind of complicated going on that will come to a close this week... I'll let you know what it is later on.

So... it's 1:23 am (woooooaaaaah! 1 2 3!), I didn't sleep at all yesterday and tomorrow there is reality to face, so see you once this grumpy spell is gone, thank you so much for your best wishes on me getting my licence! I promise I'll reply to every single one of your comments once this is over :)
You're all awesome!
  • Listening to: True Faith- New order (go watch the video)
  • Reading: A Wizard of Earthsea- Ursula K. Leguin
  • Watching: One Piece (Punk Hazard arc)
  • Playing: Pokemon Heartgold, Harvest Moon (GCN and GBA)
  • Eating: Paxil
  • Drinking: Same as allways... water
IT'S ME! :iconimsuperhappyplz:

My licence arrived today!
From now on, I'm a fully licenced veterinary surgeon!
YEAH BABY! :w00t!:

I can write prescriptions!
And buy vaccines!
And ACTUALLY GET PAID FOR HARD WORK!

and that's not all... I CAN FULLY COMPLETE MY APLICATION FOR A MASTER'S DEGREE!
OH MAN OH MAN OH MAN OH MAN!
I'M AN ADULT NOW!
HOLY CRAP IT DOESN'T FEEL LIKE IT I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!


  • Listening to: We are the champions- Queen
  • Reading: A Wizard of Earthsea- Ursula K. Leguin
  • Watching: One Piece
  • Playing: Pokemon pearl
  • Eating: Sweet granadilla
  • Drinking: Water
There is a dark stain of some sort on the floor of our backyard, it has been there forever and she didn't noticed it untill now, I can hear her digging and growling at it, she has been doing that for nearly 20 minutes now :rofl:
Beagles are so much fun! I just love that little idiot so much.

Sorry for the lack of updates recently there is a very important reason for it... 
Remember that incident on the highway? Well... I know this probably sounds like a lie but all I can do is say it and let you judge: something similar happened and this time it was more... direct.
Have you ever been afraid of dying? really dying? 
I hope you haven't,  you can plan ahead all you want but when the time comes everything just goes blank. Thankfully it was just some minor random thing that ended quickly and we all made it out unharmed. This happened a while ago and I wasn't able to write about it because it triggered stupid instinctive reactions on my brain and I couldn't even type without my hands shaking, that's the reason why I haven't been doing much latey, we all needed some time to recover. 

But you do get over something like that and we're already better, I think I may have a gun phobia now, though, but still! it's amazig how quickly the mind can heal when you let it, of course things like that always leave scars, so things may not be the same but maybe that's not a bad thing, I don't want to be cliche but it really makes you think about how much you have and how little you apreciate it, anyway, we're all fine now and I'm eager to start a new year!

And now I'm gonna do a list of... things just because I like making you read through long crap*... and er... I mean...because there are other things I'd like to talk about.

:bulletpurple: Now for something more positive: 
For the first time in history I actually like how one of my drawings turned out! it's that 02 thing I have NO IDEA how I pulled that off!
I may never be able to do something like that again but it gave me some motivation to go out of my comfort zone and try drawing humans again! ... it probably sounds really unrelated and silly and it really is xD but hey! 

:bulletblue: My vet licence will be ready in a month! And now that I think about it... I've been on this site since I was in Jr. High! Holy crap! 

:bulletgreen: I did something really stupid: I took a bite out of a Ghost pepper! My God :faint: it didn't make me sick but it makes me wonder if that is how a tongue piercing feels like or if it's more like licking the floor of a volcano.

:bulletyellow: We went to see Symphony of the Goddesses ... it still makes me want to cry a little when I remember that one song from Link's Awakening :happycry: :clap: 

:bulletorange: One of my goals for this year is: get inked! yup, I want a tattoo :) I already know what I want, where I want it and how much it's gonna cost, has anyone been through this before? I really don't know what to expect

:bulletred: I'm into One Piece now, last episode broke my heart... I'm gonna cry myself to sleep now, bye.

*It's a joke, of course, people say that those who don't talk much write a lot and... well... I usually don't talk unless talked to.
  • Listening to: Super Mario Galaxy OST
  • Reading: The Fellowship of the Ring- Tolkien
  • Watching: One Piece
  • Playing: The legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds
  • Eating: Candy
  • Drinking: Water
24.media.tumblr.com/f2d40294b3…

All fruit
40 days
59 juices left.

I can die happy now.
That's all, bye!
  • Listening to: The sound of HAPPY PIKMIN
  • Reading: zero deaths!
  • Watching: THE GLORIOUS SCREEN OF GLORY
  • Playing: PIKMIN 3! ZERO DEATHS!
  • Eating: their words, my enemies are *Yoda voice*
  • Drinking: From the sweet cup of VICTORY... and juice
THIS IS THE WORST FIRST RUN IN MY PERSONAL GAMING HISTORY!
800 down 
sniff....


Yeah... as you probably already guessed I got Pikmin 3.
I finished the game... at the cost of 800+ Piklives 
:iconorzplz:

Guys!
GUUUUUUUUUUUUYS!!!!
I DON'T LIKE THIS I'M A TERRIBLE CAPTAIN!

Here is the thing I can finish the first game in 20 days or less, and do a decent attempt at a zero-death run on the second one, I love those little carrot bugs too much and I've been honing my skills as a Pikmin captain for a while... Heck! Olimar is my main brawler in smash and that game series inspired me so much I actually spend a WEEK working on what is now my featured deviation!

So DO YOU GET IT NOW? DO YOU SEE WHY IT BOTHERS ME THAT MUCH?!
:iconomgnoesplz:
I HAVE FAILED YOU PIKMIN!
I am so sorry!
forgive me, my little soldiers.
Your sacrifice won't have been in vain.
:salute:

That game was much more fast-paced and intense than I tought, and it took me a while to get used to the new controlls (new console and all) and yeah, story mode was short but it was so action-packed that I may have gone a bit overboard and maybe I finished it sooner than intended... but that's all I can say on my defense, those poor Pikmin...

And I don't want to spoil it for anyone but there is one thing that happens to a certain character that gave me a TON of feels!
If you've played it you know what I'm talking about... I'm really attached to that character and... seeing h** during the f**** b*** sc*** ****** ****** ** ** *** ******!!!!!!!! (censored due to spoilers)

By the way, that's not the only reason  why I've been away again
Yeah, surprising, I know, but I have a very good damn reason for it! You see... I applied for that University!
I can't reveal wich one but I've already sent my application form, I'm  still missing a few papers... one of them is the TOEFL certificate and that thing requires A LOT of preparation.
I've been devoting a lot of hours only to that, more hours than pikmins lost... uuuugh.....the pain! :iconmiseryplz:
So now you know.

And I'm DEFINETLY going to attempt a second run on Pikmin 3.
Hopefully, with ZERO casualties!

  • Listening to: The Trooper - Iron Maiden
  • Reading: The Fellowship of the Ring- J.R.R Tolkien
  • Watching: Bizarre Foods
  • Playing: Pikmin 3, Animal Crossing: New Leaf
  • Eating: Pumpkin pie
  • Drinking: Melted ice
The past is gone, the future is an illusion, all we have is now!
and right now...
I'm stuck.

Stuck in real life that is ><
Two of the reasons are listed below, on the "Playing" seccion. I'm not even ashamed hah!
I'm halfway done with paperwork and in a few months I'll have my vet licence, hopefully that will lead to getting a scholarship, and after that a master's, and after that a job, and after that... we'll see.
So most of my time and energy is devoted to reality, I have been working on art, but I'm not able to upload it ^^; 

So, you may already know what happened if you read last journal, and we're all doing much better.
Part of it has a lot to do with a really bold move: we went on a road trip.
A few weeks after it happened we went on a 2 week vacation to see the family back home, in the desert.

It was a two day drive and part of it was trough a place very close to where the incident happened... it was a risky move, and I didn't like it at all! part of me was still terrified of that place... but I trust my dad, and he was in charge of the route.
Nothing happened, and that place was pretty calm! very different from where the incident happened, even if they're only about an hour away. It helped me realize that the world might not be as dangerous as I tought, still, it's always better to be safe than sorry: there were no stops untill we were at least 4 hours away from there and we had to get up early, so we could pass it during the morning.

Something very unusual happened too: Rain in the desert!
The infernal heat was gone, the air was fresh and the sky was full of clouds of epic proportions with rain pillars conecting the sky and the earth! You can see some pictures I took of it here: [link]
Once we got to out destination, we spent a week in a house by the beach with the family, it was beyond beautiful...
More pictures here: [link]

I've been thinking about my animals, too... specially my little mousey guys, only one of them is left... I miss them all so very much, specially Toffee's litter, they where the smartest, gentlest mice I've ever come across. It's a shame their lifespans are so short, and I really wished I could be a better owner to Pollock (the one that's left) he's a fat old grump and I can't handle him as much as I would like to but I still try to care for him the best way I can, but licence work is very time-consuming and other than the ocassional treat I haven't had the time to slowly "tame" him >< 
I feel like a bad owner, and have bowed not to bring another mouse to the family untill I can take proper care of him.

  • Listening to: Ramble On- Led Zeppelin
  • Reading: The Fellowship of the Ring- J.R.R Tolkien
  • Watching: Shingeki no Kyojin, One Piece
  • Playing: Animal Crossing: New Leaf, Earthbound
  • Eating: candy
  • Drinking: Dihydrogen monoxide
The family and I had to go trough a really harsh experience... it happened yet again.
Another shooting... and this time in broad daylight in the middle of a highway! 
Same story as before... high power authomatic weapons, machine guns and shotguns by the sound of it, this time there was nowhere to hide, dad managed to take refuge in a Wallmart's parking lot but there where no walls between us and the bullets,
We just waited for it to pass lying down on the floor of the car while hell broke loose around us for a fll 15 minutes.

We were lucky, some civilians weren't, a cop got killed and several people got hurt.
It was a nightmare! 
It's been a week and a half since it happened and we're all doing better, but I still jump at loud noises and I will NEVER be able to look at, or hear a gun without feeling sick. 

But man! it was so close this time! AND THE MEDIA NEVER SAID A WORD ABOUT IT!
That highway is dangerous and people have a right to know! if something like that happened in broad daylight then people deserve to be warned about it! 
It will take a while to recover but I'm doing well so far, I've been working on art and might go traveling again soon, sure, it's scary but hiding from fear is not the way to heal that type of wound, we need to go out and face it... NEVER AGAIN trough that highway, of course, but we can't just stay in one place forever.
I'll be fine, some fear still lingers but things are more or less back to normal. Videogames, food, books and my little Coquine are helping me get trough this.
  • Listening to: Blood of Heroes- Megadeth
  • Reading: The Fellowship of the Ring- J.R.R Tolkien
  • Watching: Shingeki no Kyojin, Digimon Tamers
  • Playing: Animal Crossing: New Leaf
  • Eating: Fruit salad, yummy yummy
  • Drinking: Vanilla cream soda
Squash banana
Wewe nugu
Mimi apana

*does backflip*

I'm VERY happy ladies, gentlemen, neither and everyone in-between!
BECAUSE I CLEARED MY MESSAGE BOX!

AWWW YEAH!
:iconawwyeahplz:


800 + messages cleared!

and because I'm getting a Wii U soon :nod:
I've been saving for one since summer of 2012 and now I'm a few months away from one :w00t!:
Finally, I'll be able to play Earthbound! :love:
and there's Pikmin 3! and Wind Waker HD and Game & Wario and SO MANY POSSIBILITIES!!!!

AND I'M LITERARILY 2 MONTHS AWAY FROM GETTING A VET LICENCE!!!!!
I'M GOING TO BE A FULL-FLEDGED ANIMAL HEALER BEFORE FALL!

And Animal Crossing: New Leaf is allmost out :)
some may find this game series boring but Animal Crossing is to me what rice is to japanese cuisine.
I play it a lot and almost daily and I can't get enough of it.
I suppose I could tell you why: the game is very zen.
And remember that journal where I was worried about schizoid personality disorder? no? didn't read it?

well let me explain: It wasn't "fully" schizoid (the therapist never told me what it is! ) but it has sometimes to do with anxiety, sometimes I can't relax at all.
If you've seen Iron Man 3 then ... you can't get an idea of how they're like because as far as I know, those "anxiety attacks" were as fake as a Disney subliminal message

The thing is, I need to keep my mind busy to keep it from spinning around a vortex of doom, and a relaxing game that feels like a permanent vacation is just what I need :)
it's adorable, relaxing, full of animals and customizable features, it feels like drinking a cold soda after working under the sun all day.
And now one is coming out for the 3DS with even more customizable features :faint:
I CAN'T WAIT! :D

But even if your brain is not as defective as mine, Animal Crossing is a good game :) fun to play with friends, too!
so if anyone out there is thinking about getting it
SEND FRIEND CODES!
I don't mess with trees or flowers, I promise :)
I just mess with villagers and pillage recycling bins hehe

...
just a mini update, I'm stuck doing a massive Animal Crossing themed picture.
So pardon the inconvenience but those expecting something from me will have to wait a little while  ^^;

that's it for now, thanx for reading!

OH BEFORE I GO!
ANIMAL CROSSING FANS! CHECK THIS OUT!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=E413-O…
  • Listening to: Get Lucky - Daft Punk
  • Reading: The Fellowship of the Ring- J.R.R Tolkien
  • Watching: Shingeki no Kyojin
  • Playing: The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages
  • Eating: ravioli
  • Drinking: H2O
My english homework!
That evil little ball of Beagle fur somehow managed to pull it down from the table and tore it appart!
NO ONE WILL BELIEVE ME!
but I got evidence! here: 24.media.tumblr.com/5fd5640b26…

Yup, I'm taking english lessons again becouse I finally found somewhere to do my master's in Animal Behaviour!
Somewhere across the sea, where people speak fast and with an awesome accent and I need lessons to understand it because my sonoran ears aren't used to awesomeness :faint:

And just where am I (maybe) going?
ask this guy: tf2wiki.net/w/images/f/fd/Demo…
or this girl: images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__c…

As you probably already noticed, I'm feeling much better :)
I did go see a doctor and it turns out it was, indeed, clinical depression.
As to what caused it... it was a freakin' side effect! :shakefist:

of Isoretinoin (Accutane/ Roccutane/ Trevissage) wich I didn't want to take, but my parents insisted on it so much that I finally gave in... sure, my face is cleaner and it lifted my self-esteem a little BUT IT WAS NOT WORTH IT!
at one point it got so bad I began to understand why people want to kill themselves (not that I tried! I just knew why)
Besides, my skin is so dry it opens up and beeds in some places, my eyes are dry, red and sandy, my joins hurt and my nails are falling to pieces! I look like a zombie!... with a faaaaaaaabulous face :icondivaplz:

A lower dose and some therapy (part of it  involved a self-prescription of chocolate hehe) fixed the problem but I'm only halfway trough the treatment, and there is no guarantee the low mood won't come back.
And, to be honest, I got very little help... I tought I could manage on my own because anyone else around me had problems of their own, and whenever I wanted to ask someone for help, I would see their own problems outweighted mine and would stop...
But, you know, when you need help you need help, and the fact that someone else has bigger problems than your doesn't mean yours don't matter... so I gathered up the courage and asked!
turns out my problem had an easy solution and it actually made that person happy because I trusted her with something personal.


And... I lost another little mouse, this time it was Gus, the chubby one.
He died of old age just a few months before his 3th birthday, he's burried with the rest of his family.
Only Pollock is left... he's not precisely friendly ^^; he is very territorial and hates the camera (that's why I can't take his picture, I'd rather not stress him too much), he bites, too!
So... yeah, only one little mouse left and I don't have the time to have new ones... bureaucracy sucks! it rips time like a crack from Doctor Who! and I don't want to get any new pets if I won't have the time to interact with them as it should.


AND I'M SORRY BUT I HAD TO NUKE A FEW THINGS FROM MY INBOX!
600+ messages, it's a bit too much!
But I won't be neglecting anything, just give me a little time ^^; you know I get distracted easily and reviewing 600+ comments, deviations, journals, etc. isn't swift work.

So.. yeah, sorry for the long ramble, thanx for reading.
What I learned out of all this was:
1- NEVER be afraid to ask for help, especialy from those closest to you.
2- AVOID ISORETINOIN IF POSSIBLE!
3- "Today" is pronounced "tuh-day" and not "too-day"
4- Shrink (spanish: "Loquero") is an offensive term  (but my therapist seems to like it xD)
5- Absinthe tastes like crap
6- I shouldn't have drunk absinthe while taking isoretinoin... but it was just a sip... not worth it... bleh!
7- Beagles and homeworks don't get along
8- I'm getting a Wii U soon!
9- And I might start playing Minecraft soon, too!
10- My school is run by Vogons

AND NOW FOR ART-RELATED NEWS!

:bulletred: Still no scanner! but we should be able to get a new one by next week, expect a MASSIVE upload!

:bulletblue: I decided to go back to Furaffinity (blocking adult stuff of course) and to try drawing anthros again, I want my style to have more... personality and exploring different art sites may help, I think I've been stuck with the same art style for a long time now and trying new things might help me improve.
Here is my new account if you'd like to find me there: www.furaffinity.net/user/antar…
  • Listening to: Hell&#039;s Bells- ACDC
  • Reading: The Fellowship of the Ring- J.R.R Tolkien
  • Watching: Mythbusters
  • Playing: Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Gates to Infinity
  • Eating: shrimp
  • Drinking: H2O
Uh...
once again, sorry for the absence ^^;
Man, I'm allways apologizing for that and I KEEP DOINT IT! :facepalm: it might sound like I'm making up excuses and I know how that makes me look, but it can't be hellped, I can't do anything else but tell the truth and hope it's good enough ^^;

I've been busy DYING IN AWE over that  russian meteorite and with all that vet license paperwork, turns out the system crashed and some information was lost.
Long story short: I'm stuck in a job-less, school-less void of unproductiveness untill april :faint:
It's a bit like a long, boring vacation ^^; besides english class and house work there is little else to do.

Oh, and my scanner died again :shakefist:
NEVER buy one of those "all in one" printer-scanner-copy machine things, they suck.
I have been working on art but I won't be able to upload it untill it gets repaired.


Aaaand the reason this journal is so so very possitive is... my brain is malfunctioning, nothing is really wrong but everything feels wrong, I think it might be clinical depression or something. It's like my brain and feelings don't match, my head knows everything is allright but everything else refuses to believe it, it's weird! and it won't let me do anything else!
It's not mild either! I don't like internet drama so I'll keep the details to myself, but it's scaring me... nausea, headaches and a weird ringing noise in my ears are a part of it, too, I may need a neurologist for this one.

Games seem to help, a lot, even talking about them improves my mood so here goes: right now in a HUMONGOUSLY GIANT PLANET-SIZED Disney mood.
It has a lot to do with playing Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance, I really enjoyed playing trough The Grid (I :heart: my Cyber Yog!) and I'm swooning over that Fantasia world :love: it's so beautiful! and the music! and it's full of equines and dragons!
All the music on that game is so awesome... and those spirits are really growing on me :)

And as a direct consequence of playing too much KH, I re-watched The Hunchback of Notre Dame...
BEAUTIFUL!
The music, the animation, the backgrounds... :faint: I'm in love once again.
And I now officialy declare Quasimodo to be my favourite animated Disney hero :salute:
(Tron's my favourite of them all but I'm not sure he counts as "animated")
still... I couldn't help but notice...
1- Quasimodo's mom was a gyspy, therefore, Quasimodo must be a gyspy

And 2-
CLOPIN
IS
HALF
BALD

sovereignbrigand.tripod.com/ju…
24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mao…
24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m96…

High hairline my 3 <- (it's a butt)
he's balding.


So, once again, I will be inactive untill my stupid neurons are back to normal.
I'm fine, it doesn't feel fine but I've been out of worse, I just need some time off, I don't know for how long.
I'll be lurking around a bit here (I'll be more acrive on Tumblr) but don't expect anything major ^^;
  • Listening to: Anneaux- Cirque du Soleil (Corteo)
  • Reading: The Caves Of Steel - Isaac Asimov
  • Watching: The Hunchback of Notre Dame
  • Playing: Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance
  • Eating: Edamame
  • Drinking: Aguita